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A New Beginning
Feb. 14th, 2010 06:31 pmAt this stage of the game, I'm probably the only person reading this... and to be quite honest, that's fine with me.
I had started this account with the thought of starting over, then I decided to ditch this account and make my LJ account 'work' since I had never given it a chance to begin with.
I dove into it with total abandon, but I still don't feel comfortable there. This whole concept of virtual friends makes me tired and lonely. I have enough issues with depression to deal with not to make it feel moreso.
SO! In an effort to 'start again', I'm going to give this journal another chance. I want to write original fiction. I want to write stories about my life, my children and the things I see around me. Maybe, if I'm lucky, I may make friends here, but I'd like this to be a journal that I can show to existing friends and real-life friends. I don't want virtual friends anymore, not that they don't exist, but I get more satisfaction out of sitting over coffee with a friend playing Scrabble and yakking than I ever do spending endless hours here.
That's what I want. Friends I can have coffee with. ... Is that so much to ask for? Maybe this is a time for me to start anew -- fresh and without any reservations that anyone is going to be upset by this.
I had started this account with the thought of starting over, then I decided to ditch this account and make my LJ account 'work' since I had never given it a chance to begin with.
I dove into it with total abandon, but I still don't feel comfortable there. This whole concept of virtual friends makes me tired and lonely. I have enough issues with depression to deal with not to make it feel moreso.
SO! In an effort to 'start again', I'm going to give this journal another chance. I want to write original fiction. I want to write stories about my life, my children and the things I see around me. Maybe, if I'm lucky, I may make friends here, but I'd like this to be a journal that I can show to existing friends and real-life friends. I don't want virtual friends anymore, not that they don't exist, but I get more satisfaction out of sitting over coffee with a friend playing Scrabble and yakking than I ever do spending endless hours here.
That's what I want. Friends I can have coffee with. ... Is that so much to ask for? Maybe this is a time for me to start anew -- fresh and without any reservations that anyone is going to be upset by this.